you know how sometimes, you're typing... and your brain just... takes a left? yeah. that's how this happens:
Once upon a time, in a kingdom far away, there lived an elf named Derp. Derp was not the smartest of elves. he was not the luckiest. he was not the soberest. but he did understand one thing... the importance of beer goggles. that's how Derp got all the lady elves. and a couple of lady bugs. beer goggles go both ways. but one day Derp's plan backfired. he went out back of the bar with a "pretty lady" and got a blowjob from an ogre with a cold sore. and now we call him Herp Derp. which we SHOULD feel bad about, especially now that he's braindamaged - I did mention he's not the luckiest elf - but we don't. b/c we're terrible ppl. but we're ok with that. b/c fuck you Herp Derp, i'm a human and I've never had sex with a lady bug.
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